High Five: Metallica, Tailgate Nuptuals, and More Butt-Banging (No, Not Like THAT)

Happy Monday! As always, I’ve got 5 of the best sports headlines to discuss with the office, the other half, and the offspring…

1) Retiring Yankees pitcher Mariano Rivera received a surprise Sunday when his classic entrance song, Metallica’s “Enter Sandman,” was played by none other than Metallica themselves. This, plus a signed guitar and a rocking chair were just some of Rivera’s final game celebration. The Panamanian closer is a 13-time all-star, five-time World Series champ, baseball’s leader in saves (652) and games finished (952), and pretty much a lock for the Hall of Fame.

chuck pagano

Who needs Hair Club for Men?

2) Perhaps the only football news more shocking last week than the Cleveland Browns trading top running back Trent Richardson to Indianapolis was that Cleveland went on to win Sunday, 31-27 over Minnesota without him. The move, angering fans and muddying trust of a front office that has changed four times in six years, is likely a way to free up money for new players in the future—hopefully boosting a team that hasn’t seen a winning season since the Crusades. (Personally, I think this is what Cleveland gets for robbing my hometown Memphis of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, but that’s just me.) Meanwhile, Richardson’s Colts also won 27-7 behind QB Andrew Luck—against his former college (Stanford) coach Jim Harbaugh and the 49ers.

3) So I was watching the Indianapolis post-game press conference, and I was wondering just who the blue-shirted coach talking was. Oh yeah, head coach Chuck Paganowith hair. Pagano missed nearly all of the 2012 season after he was diagnosed with leukemia. In support, team members and even cheerleaders shaved their heads as he endured chemotherapy; now he, and his hair, are back at the Colts’ helm. Welcome back, CHUCKSTRONG!

4) Much like last year’s infamous “butt fumble,” in which the Jets’ Mark Sanchez did this against his own teammate, the newest viral hilarity is the “butt slide.” As Cincinnati’s Brandon Phillips protected second base, the Houston Astros’ shortstop Jonathan Villar slammed right into his posterior—and to add insult to embarrassment, was also called out:

5) Tailgating consists of all the best things in life—food, music, friends and family…so why not save some dough and have your wedding at the same time? That’s exactly what Louisville couple Vonnie Edwards and Jeff Miller did Saturday before the Cardinals/Florida International game—and apparently it was her idea! A justice of the peace married them, in their fan gear—which was also suggested for the guests. And with Louisville currently #7, that’s one bridesmaid outfit you actually can wear again someday!

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